I'm bad at breathing
Any time I have to focus on my breath I become acutely aware of how just how poor my ability to breathe is. It feels like I can never breathe both fully and comfortably, something gets stuck past a certain point, but I know my lungs are not yet full.
Breathing is undoubtedly the most important skill one could possess, and given I have had so much practice, I am little embarrassed to be underperforming to the extent that I am. I suppose I have had a lot of time to reinforce my own bad habits, and it probably has something to do with my constant use of technology and wholly fractured attention.
It seems naive to suggest that I might make another attempt at having a regular meditation practice, but I hope to at least try to get better at breathing, and the two are basically the same thing.