Old Photos

My parents always used to take a lot of pictures on family holidays, which we went on quite regularly when I was younger. I'm not sure I am sold on the concept of taking photos in general - I worry that if I am trying to capture a moment in a photograph, I am not truly experiencing that moment. I have also grown to dislike having my photo taken rather a lot. I'm not sure how to smile like a normal person and I'm not sure what to do with my hands.

Looking at these old photos made me really sad. They were from a simpler time. I smiled, and I didn't care what I did with my hands. In many of them I looked genuinely happy, often with an arm around my brother. I feel disconnected from the person I saw in them - people jokingly say "what went wrong?" in these types of situations, but I feel like something really did go wrong. I wish I could go back to the times they were taken, and regain whatever ignorance or naivete I have since lost.