I love you II

Two years after Mica posted this, and while the title certainly hasn’t stood the test of time, I think I recently came to feel differently about what she wrote. While she longed for her boyfriend to reciprocate her verbal affection, she gave it anyway, knowing that he was unlikely to give her what she so desired in return. While I previously mused about how weird the phrase itself is, I wanted to add a little to that, and update my stance on saying ‘I love you’.

I am better at saying it now then I was back in October 2017 (which was not exactly a time in my life that was full of love). If you give me a beer, I’ll probably tell you I love you, for example. But now I have realised when saying the phrase, rather than hearing it, can bring me the most joy - when I have no expectations to hear it in return. When I simply don’t care what the other person’s response is, when I am saying it purely to inform or remind them of the fact and ‘speak my truth’ (a phrase I am growing to loathe more and more) three words at a time. Obviously it’s not easy, but when I previously talked of other times in my life I had said those words, they were almost always uttered for the purpose of being on the receiving end of it immediately afterwards. And now, they are not, and I like that.