Published in Featured - 6 mins to read

This week I have been trying to follow this set of goal setting exercises, one of which was to write down a list of 100 of my successes in my life. It was a pretty fun(ny) thing to do, and seeing as it’s my 23rd birthday today, it was cool to reflect on some of the cool things I’ve done in my short life.


I have felt guilty for a long time that even having a blog is kind of bragging, and it’s impossible to write about oneself on the internet without some element of pretentiousness. Normally I try to limit my posts to one brag-per-post, but this is 100 pretty shameless brags… it’s my birthday so IDGAF.


100 successes


  1. Learned to walk
  2. Learned to talk
  3. Learned not to shit myself
  4. Made a friend
  5. Learned to swim
  6. Got a really good 11+ score
  7. Got really good GCSEs
  8. Didn't fail my A Levels
  9. Won the school debating cup
  10. Ran the 1500m in house sports day and came last by over 90 seconds
  11. Had an argument so vehement with our head of year that one of my classmates described witnessing it as one of his favourite memories of his entire school career
  12. Didn't go to physics lessons for a whole two weeks after the teacher said to me "if you don't want to be here, don't come"
  13. Got an offer from Cambridge University
  14. Got a bursary from a top offshore law firm
  15. Went to Lancaster University
  16. Briefly ran a puzzle page for the university student newspaper
  17. Skied down the mountain which was the setting for a James Bond film
  18. Was part of a photo of myself and two friends, standing at the peak of a mountain, topless in sub zero temperatures doing the Usain Bolt pose
  19. Was on Lancaster Uni Men's 1sts fencing team, and captained them for a few matches
  20. Represented Lancaster Uni at chess, and won every game I played for them
  21. Represented Lancaster Uni at dota, and got rekt nearly every game
  22. Beat York fencing team in Roses, with the sabre team winning 45-6
  23. Was awarded a full rose (highest sporting award) from uni, even though I 100% didn't deserve it
  24. Competed in the Junior Commonwealth Fencing Championships
  25. Competed in the Senior Commonwealth Fencing Championships
  26. Came second in Public School's Fencing Championships, twice
  27. Became Guernsey junior chess champion
  28. Competed in Dubai u14 chess international
  29. Had brunch in the Burj al Arab
  30. Competed in British u14 and u16 chess championships
  31. Beaten multiple candidate masters
  32. Played a grandmaster and got cheated out of a win by the arbiter (admittedly the GM was blindfolded and playing 5 other people)
  33. Won a game of amateur competitive dota, as captain of my team of school friends
  34. Got invited to a party with the "cool" kids, ditched it early to watch the finals of Dreamhack Winter 2012
  35. Went to Dreamhack London, my first big LAN
  36. Logged ~2500 hours of dota
  37. Got a sub 30min Super Meat Boy any% speedrun (<20 mins coming soon)
  38. Got a sub 3:20 Refunct any% speedrun (<3 mins coming soon)
  39. Was briefly in a ska band, that had one practice session and then disbanded
  40. Went on an orchestral tour to Canada
  41. Came stone cold last in a marching band competition
  42. Played Last Post and Reveille for a remembrance service in the nearest church to a pub in Great Britain
  43. Somehow got the youth choir I was in to perform my arrangement of "Sons of Skyrim", in fluent Dovah-Zul (dragon-voice).
  44. Saw Brand New Live
  45. Saw the Foo Fighters live, where Dave Grohl talked about Kurt Cobain and Nirvana while playing acoustic guitar solo for 15 minutes
  46. Came 2nd in an online poker tournament for $26k
  47. Cashed my first live tournament in Bucharest
  48. Learned to drive
  49. Learned to ride a bike (in that order)
  50. Got a real job
  51. Quit my real job to play poker
  52. Joined a mastermind group
  53. Traveled abroad to meet "internet friends" in real life
  54. Moved out of my parents' metaphorical basement
  55. Moved to Mexico
  56. Learned how to order a beer in 5 languages
  57. Learned how to swear in 10 languages
  58. Visited 21 countries (not including some I may have forgotten)
  59. Spent an hour in a sensory deprivation float tank
  60. Lost 30lbs in 70 days, and and could not recommend it less
  61. Benched 90kg
  62. Squatted 175kg
  63. Deadlifted 180kg
  64. Ran the entire school cross country without walking, somehow
  65. Kicked depression in the dick
  66. Met some incredibly inspiring people during group therapy
  67. Survived a week in an adult psychiatric ward, at 17
  68. Attempted the uni fencing team 45 shot challenge (15 shots each) - twice
  69. Drunk 750ml of tequila to myself, straight, in ~two hours
  70. Played a jazz concert with one of my best friends while so drunk we could barely talk
  71. Drunkenly sung Jerusalem as loud as possible while coming into St Peter Port Harbour on my friend's boat
  72. Tried a "Dragon's Breath" - a shot comprised of absinthe and ghost pepper extract
  73. Made out with a girl
  74. Made out with someone else's girlfriend
  75. Made out with my friend's sister - oops
  76. Got a girlfriend of my own (and made out with her)
  77. Got a handjob, on a balcony, in Greece, on a school trip
  78. Lost my viriginity
  79. Had sex with another girl who was actually pretty hot
  80. Had sex with another girl who was actually pretty hot, who I'd only met that day, while under the impression that she was a lesbian
  81. Had sex with a girl with 36GG breasts
  82. Had sex with two different girls on the same day
  83. Had sex with my friend's sister - OOPS
  84. Fell in love
  85. Got a serious girlfriend
  86. Split up with my serious girlfriend
  87. Tried pole dancing
  88. Drove a RIB
  89. Once tweeted something so apparently hilarious, that Fedor Holz liked it
  90. Organised a school Winter Ball, which turned out to be a messy, messy occasion
  91. Somehow ended up at a hen party where I didn't know anyone, and it was announced that I was "the evening entertainment"
  92. Wrote some really awful but bizarrely functional code
  93. Watched my best friend's middle-aged mother drunkenly perform the Gangnam Style dance
  94. Befriended a published mathematician, with her own named theorem
  95. Drove down some beautiful Scottish b-roads at 100mph on a roadtrip with my best friend
  96. Wore a pink dress in a nightclub, and got a lot of compliments on it
  97. Started a .com website with my name as the url
  98. Walked through the high street with 50 of my classmates, all dressed as pirates, singing an African war chant
  99. Gave my little brother invaluable advice on girls, drinking, and getting out of line
  100. Accidentally bought my mum a dildo and created one of the best stories ever