Things I Wish I Knew When I Was Younger

This post is in part written for my younger brother, and in part for my younger self. It contains some things I wish I’d known, or perhaps believed, when I was a teenager.

Perspective is everything

It is an awful cliché, but I think most such clichés are imbued with a drop of the truth, this one especially so. A sense of perspective is important for a happy life, and in order to achieve that, it’s necessary to constantly re-evaluate and be mindful of your current position. When faced with a seemingly impassable obstacle, it is easy to forget the previous occasions upon which you did in fact overcome such an obstacle, and instead become mired in doubt and self pity over whether or not the problem before you can be solved. The vast majority of your difficulties can and will be resolved - you just need to learn to take a step back and realise that.

Be as honest as you possibly can

We’re not taught to be honest, especially about our feelings. We are taught from a young age that stoicism is the order of the day, and displays of emotion are displays of weakness. Things are slowly changing, but we need to change faster, to quick on the uptake and ahead of the curve. The prospect of honesty is often terrifying, and I know all too well the feeling of fear that accompanies the notion of being rejected by the people you care about once you reveal whatever it is that’s on your mind. Start small, but then get big. Go first - be vulnerable with the people around you, and the ones worth being close to will reciprocate. Don’t worry about the other ones. Honesty will change your life immeasurably for the better.

Feel your feelings

Negative emotions are scary, but they serve a purpose, and another thing that we’re not taught is to embrace them. Not only is it OK to feel sad or angry or lonely or anxious, it’s important, a necessary part of being a human. Those feelings will keep you from harm when you listen to them, but if you try to run from them, they’ll eventually catch up with you in unpleasant and uncouth ways. It really is OK to cry, just let it all out.

Go outside

Going outside is very underrated, especially in Guernsey. It’s so beautiful here, the fresh air will do you good, and if you go walking on the cliffs early in the morning, you won’t even come across any people who so peskily cause you anxiety. The vitamin D will stop you getting so tired. Maybe you’ll even get a tan?

It’ll be ok - really

It often feels like the world is feeling down on us - but it really isn’t. Our safety net is comically large, and more of a safety trampoline than anything. No matter how grim things may seem, there’s always a way out, and things will always get better. I promise.